I'm feeling a lot better! I was thinking I would be down for the count for a few days but it seems like all I have now is the dull ache of a normal period.
I'm still taking it easy.. Walking on the treadmill instead of running, but I got my food in check for right now and I'm happy about that!
I'm in Tampa for work :( the weather is nice and sunny, but it's a little cold. I'm at a hotel walking distance to the office which is nice, but it felt pretty darn cold this morning.
Eats- egg white omelet with fruit, chicken Caesar salad with a banana, and a shrimp quesadilla, with no sour cream or quac.
I walked on the treadmill for 45 minutes this morning and I think I'm headed down there again now. I guess I could sit in my hotel room and read or watch TV but its only 8pm so I've got plenty of time to kill.
Looking to be just as good tomorrow!

Well that failed. I definitely need a do-over on the Arden's Garden fast.
To be completely honest I am not surprised. I've been pretty stressed out, and I tend to over eat when I'm in a stressful situation or something that I can't control.
This time it was because I was worried about getting an IUD. I have really been wanting to get it, and I heard that it would mean no pregnancies and no periods for 5 years. How do you pass that up? What was really concerning me was the pain- I had heard it hurt soooo much... Like having a baby. The worry was consuming me and so I was consuming food... Not good. I had the procedure this morning and boy, was it painful. It was pretty simple, they open you up with one of those metal clamps, and then put a tube into your cervix, kind of like a tampon.. They expel the IUD and then pull the tube out and you're done. Unfortunately the first one they put in pulled out when the tube came out so I had to go through the whole thing again. My doctor said it was probably defective...
Now I am home and I hurt a lot... Just like bad cramps.. And I want to eat everything.

Day 1 of Arden's Garden juice fast is complete. I went to the gym and took a weight class yesterday which really just sucked it out of me. I couldn't manage to do anything last night after that. Makes sense... If you're just drinking juice, how could you expect your muscles to be strong?
I really need to clean my house, and last nght would have been the perfect opportunity, but instead I watched tv and then ::gasp:: ate pizza.
Stupid boyfriend reminded me that he had forgotten his leftovers. If he hasn't said anything, I would never have noticed, and would have finished the day with zero solid food. I guess I wasn't too mad at myself because they were small pieces from one of those gourmet shops and couldn't have been more than 400 calories total. I called it 600 and was still under my calorie goal.
This juice stuff has a lot of sugar!! Makes sense I guess... But it's really not necessarily a "low calorie" fast.
I'm going to finish strong today WITHOUT food, and plan on continuing into tomorrow when my juice is finally finished.

Today and tomorrow I am participating in a juice fast. I just need to do something. I know this wont be a permanent fix, and that the results I will see aren't forever, but I'm 14 hours in and have 34 left to go and am feeling good.

I used to be a faster and a starver.... As I've gotten older and read more and more on nutrition, I truly understand that your body cannot function at its full potential without calories. However, it is easy to see a quick fix idea and think that it might work, or it might be worth it. The healthier me is larger than the younger me who did fast and over exercise and all that... So what is my reward for doing it right!?

I'm going to give this a solid two days and then head to Tampa for work. I'll be eating while I'm there, but I will be alone for dinners which is nice, as long as I can manage not to binge.

I'm alive. Just lost the motivation to write. I'm so tired of trying so hard every day and not seeing results

Goal 1 has been accomplished.

I am CPR certified.  There is nothing holding me back from becoming a personal trainer.... except for myself.

So what's my problem.  Excuses.  I make excuses for myself.  It can be something like

"My, its been a good few days so far...the office is providing lunch from Baja Fresh.  I'll eat the salad, and just half a wrap.  I'll save my healthy lunch for dinner.  Oh, they have tortilla chips.  Okay well then just a few."  3 hours later, healthy dinner has been eaten, as well as a 250 calorie whole wheat bagel ("well, thats healthy... it's high in calories and full of carbs.. but its better than candy") but then I see some candy that my roommate left lying around, and its all out the window.  Before I know it, I'm 600 calories over my goal and I'm depressed about myself so I keep eating the candy.

So I think what I need to do is list out my excuses. And then decide on a reason these excuses  wont work (that may be another post).

So.  My Excuses.  Please list yours as well below in the comments.. I'm sure if you have some different excuses, I probably just missed it)

1. "It's free.  How could you pass up free food"
2. "The weekend is the time I should be allowed to cheat"
3. "My boyfriend can eat it and says thin, I want to keep up"
4. "I've been good the last few [Days/Meals/Hours], I deserve a treat"
5. "Something great happened, a cookie or cake would be a great way to celebrate"
6. "I don't have TIME to cook a healthy dinner.  I'm just going to stop by Moe's... thats healthier than fast food"
7. "I don't have TIME to cook a healthy dinner... I'm just not going to eat."
8. "Starving is easier... and I'll get results.  I should just starve"

So, 2 weeks straight where I haven't lost weight.  Because I'm trying to lose the "last 10 lbs" and they are really vanity pounds, not health pounds, I really struggle with how many calories I should eat.  My BMR is slightly under 1500 calories.  I *know* I shouldn't go under this amount, but instead be working out and eating clean foods to jumpstart my weight loss again.... but it's just so tempting to say "eat as little as possible and lose now!!"  Obviously that's not working for me, right?

I need a new plan

Gahh.. how can I find a middle ground?