A few weeks ago I wrote you from the doctors office excited to tell you how I was below 140. Today I am back, weighing about 145, and with a lot on my mind. Abnormal pap. I don't even know what that means. I'm scared, sick to my stomach, worried about the impending biopsy and how (if at all) this will change my future.
I realize that the worst thing I can do is focus on the worst case scenario, but I find it very hard not to jump to "cancer" as the source of this issue. Honestly, I come every year. If I DO have cancer, I doubt that it would be at a stage that wasn't managable. Whatever is wrong can be fixed. Logically, I know, but it doesn't stop me from jumping to the worst conclusions.
Im going in. Wish me luck!