ate 1000 calories today.. burned 600 at the gym.  in bed now, refusing to get up or make any dinner, for fear that i will inhale the frozen cookie dough in my freezer.  nope.  staying in bed.

i know i've been MIA.  It's my TOM.. it only comes every 3 months, so when it does come, its bad.  I spent the last week eating everything I could get my hands on.  I was so ashamed to see the scale going up and not down.  BUT.. now that I actually have it, my cravings aren't nearly as bad, and I finished off yesterday at 1,200 calories... burning 1,000 at the gym, so a deficit of around 1,500.  My calorie count website said that the exercises I did at the gym only burned 600.. but I was wearing a heart rate monitor.... I wonder which to believe!  Anyway... after my 1,200 calorie day.. I had no plans to eat.... but as I was catching up on a tv show, I heard the call of mixed nuts in my cabinet.  I ate almost the entire bag... 170 X 5 is the entire bag = 850... I probably ate more like 700. UGH.  How is it even possible to eat that many nuts?!  And isn't it sad that I don't want to include that in my total for yesterday because I don't want to change my calorie count deficit?  I want to lie to myself.  How stupid.  I have so many good things in my house... so many healthy options.  I just need to make a list of things I will eat each day this week... instead of coming home and picking whatever I want bc there are so many options.  Hmm.

it always seems like something is holding me back.  busy season is upon me... as if i haven't already been working myself to the bone.  i have a major project being delivered on thursday, so we're all on edge about getting it done and sent off and having a day or two to breathe before we start on our other clients.  needless to say, the only exercise i've gotten in the last 2 weeks is my weekly spin class saturday morning.  This saturday I had to go to the 8:15 class so I could make it to work!!!  That class is only 45 minutes, but I kicked my ass and burned 550 calories.
sunday i had planned on going to the gym and grocery shopping and all that good stuff, but my boy took me to IHOP for breakfast, and although i picked something "healthy" I still wasn't happy that I ate so much.  I didn't eat for the rest of the day, and by the time I got to the grocery store I was super hungry, and bought cheetos.  I seriously ate the entire bag in one day.  how gross is that.  I didn't have time to work out either because I promised to do so many things.  Seriously.. my calories on Sunday were close to 3,000!!!!!!
Yesterday I totally paid for it.  I felt ill all day, and only consumed a luna bar, some fruit snacks, and a handful of chex mix.  I am ready to get all the crap out of my body... but it doesn't seem like my digestive system is being cooperative.

I booked a cruise with my mom after busy season is over (mid April).  I think it's good to have a vacation booked so I have a deadline for getting into the shape I want.  I haven't considered exactly what I want to accomplish, but I will in the next few days and let you know.  If only my mother would jump on the weight loss band wagon.. she's been heavy as long as I've been alive, and its not healthy

Snowed In Day 3.  Today I am going to do some exercise!  Just because I'm stuck inside does not give me an excuse not to exercise.  My old trainer posted a blog of things you can do indoors to really get your heart pumping:
Lunges - complete 3 sets of 10 reps on each leg
Pushups – complete 2 sets of 10 – 12 reps
Squat Thrusts or Burpees – complete 2 sets of 10 reps
Dips on a Chair or Couch – complete 2 sets of 12 – 15 reps
Climb your Stairs (stepping on every other stair) – climb the stairs 15 times
Plie’ Squats (toes at a 45 degree angle) – 2 sets of 12 reps
Wall Sit (sit against a wall and hold for 30 – 45 seconds) – repeat 3 times
Sit Ups (place your feet under the edge of a couch if you need to) – complete 2 sets of 25 reps

I'm going to skip the squat thrusts since I live above someone... but definitely doing the other stuff!

Good and Bad news

So... since my awful new years experiences (which I feel I shouldn't really have to explain.. because it was new years... just think alcohol)... I've been entirely too good.  I went 8 days without drinking, then had a margarita... but in that time, was also great about food too.  I managed to see my weight in the 142s.. which hasn't happened in IDK.. forever.  The last 2 days haven't been as good...   We got snowed in... I live in GA- 4 inches is a lot.. especially when it ices.  So I'm stuck inside all day-- working.. and I ate a healthy breakfast and lunch, but a girlfriend brought me these delicious biscuits from her trip to England, and I've been munching on them all day.  At 80 calories each.. i've eaten way more than my budget.  Today I did not have a calorie deficit for the first time this year... and I'm really disappointed with myself.  I have so much healthy food in the house, you'd think I'd pick better choices.  I think I am just going to throw those cookies in the garbage.  I did shovel some snow today... all the steps that lead down to my car.  Not that I can leave the driveway, but I thought it'd be a good idea to not have ice build up... does that count as exercise?

I'm going to throw those cookies away.  And I'll probably be snowed in tomorrow too, but I'll make more of an effort, promise :)

ate a chicken biscuit for breakfast today... and made up for it the rest of the day by eating barely anything.  Ended up with a 950 calorie deficit.  Highest I've had in forever!

 

I'm copying MLM.  Here is my start pictures.  Honestly, I think I look really good for 145.  I'm full of muscle.. I have a decently flat stomach, and really the only place I'm REALLY unhappy with is my thighs and saddle bags.  One thing I do love about myself is my butt.  It doesn't sag (yet) and I don't want to lose it.  So, my goal isn't as drastic as others... I want to get down to 130.  15 lbs. 3 lbs a month?  I need to think about this and come up with a plan.

New Year, New Resolutions

last year my NYR was to read 30 books.  I made it to 20.  I think that is pretty good!

Here is what I'm toying with this year:
1) Running a 5k
2) Reading 21 books :P
3) Drinking only once a week
4) Writing a letter to a friend once a week (I have a list of 50 people who get letters... I need 2 more!!)
5) Go to the gym 150 times
6) Take 52+ spin classes
7) Save 10% of my income

I want one that is meaningful... last year's was... I don't know why, but it was a goal that was measurable and attainable (almost), and I didn't feel like a failure when I didn't meet it, because I made a good effort to try and I still got to read 20 great books.  The problem with running is that I don't want to do it.  I've tried the couch to 5k program and I make it to the 3rd week and quit.  I just don't want to feel like a failure.  I'd like to learn to cook, but realistically, could I say "make 1 new meal per week" and actually stick with it?