Boyfriend and I talked last night. He threw a huge curve ball at me and told me he wasn't sure if he loved me. What kind of terrible person tells you they love you if they don't!? We said it early. He said it first... I guess I'm his first serious relationship in years and he probably has new feelings he's confused about. Still. You don't say it til you KNOW. I want to break up with him. How do you stay with someone wondering if they love you? It's different if you never brought it up... But it's not like I can take it back. So am I stuck wondering if he sees a future with me? Waiting around until he decides? Or do I try to move on? If we had never said it in the first place things would be fine. When that hit the fan, we didn't even have a chance to talk about me feeling unspecial. I guess I assume he will feel bad enough about this to put forth a bit more effort.
The sadness is helping my diet. And I went spinning yesterday to burn off 620 calories and skipped dinner. I guess I need to take care of myself if I don't have someone else to take care of me
Well, that explains why you don't feel cherished. Clearly his heart isn't in it. If he's not sure if he loves you it probably means he doesn't b/c you certainly know when you are. You definitely deserve better. If that's truly how he feels I think it's good that he is being honest so at least you know...which often sucks but at least you know and can decide what you want to be from there. Cheer up. He might come around but if he doesn't then he just isn't "the one." : )
ReplyDeleteHow awful! Both long-term boyfriends I had when I was younger pulled that stupidity. They both were quick and eager to drop the "L" word and when we broke up, that was the reason. My current boyfriend (and hopefully soon to be fiance) also did the same thing, but when we broke up, he realized he made a huge mistake and worked to win me back. The only advice I can offer is that no matter what anyone tells you, it just sucks. You feel awful and nothing but time changes that. Don't blame yourself for making the wrong choice or anything like that. Either he will come around or he won't and you will have already begun the healing process. Try to surround yourself with the people and things that make you the happiest and keep you distracted. I'm really sorry that you even have to go through this, I've been there and it's horrible.
ReplyDeleteChin up, buttercup!
How maddening! Obviously you know that is BS and you don't deserve it. Glad the diet is going well! Hope the love life improves soon.
ReplyDeleteThat is just shitty. I'd feel bad too and wonder what was going on inside. You don't say it unless you know. You deserve someone who knows how they feel and what they want.
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